I read a story ages back in some Bertrand Russell book which has stuck in my memory, still. I don’t remember the entire story clearly because it was way long back but I still remember bit sand pieces of it.
Sadly, I have lost the book and can’t refer to it again.
The story was a conundrum of a sort. That much I remember.
Suppose there is a guy sinking in the quick sand, asking for help to everyone passing that path and then, you notice him.
Should you help him or should you not?
I know what you must be thinking. It is more of an ethical, moral question than a pragmatic one.
If you are not an author or a philosopher, then I guess you will just go and help him because you may not like human suffering. But if you are an author or a philosopher indeed, then you would like to ponder sometime wondering what will be consequences of every choice that you are going to make, if you help the poor man who is about to be drowned in the sand and face the worst death that can be faced by anyone.
Since I am not a very deep thinking person, let me just tell you why I used this example specifically.
I have a bad habit of helping people. You must be thinking “ohhh… how modest he is and what a nice guy”.
But wait — hold the horses of your thought.
I have a bad habit of helping people — who are not seeking help from me.
Often times people talk to me about their problems. It took me years to understand that just because someone is telling you his problem doesn’t mean that they are seeking help from you. May be they just want to talk.
My journey of understanding human mind started way long back. I guess it all started in 2014. It was a terrible year for me financially and career wise, and I wondered if there was any future for me.
I am one of those guys who never think about suicide when there is trouble. As a kid I did think of suicide, like any other kid does, but it was only because I was terribly bored of my life.
When I am in trouble, I look for solutions. I don’t know from where I have developed this attitude but it is there inside me.
In 2014, trouble happened. I was devastated and I looked for solutions. I found it. I applied the solution and it worked. Now I got curious and did an idiotic thing. Then I wondered why it worked.
Sometimes it is better to be idiot and save time than try to be an intellectual and later realize that no one cares.
I had to go through a journey of six years to know why that solution worked, also what was wrong with me and figure out that despite doing everything great success books asked me to do, I was still a failure.
When I call myself a failure, do not take it too literally. The problem is that I am over ambitious and my criteria of getting successful is quite high due to which I often see myself as a failure, when I am not a failure.
No, I am not trying to justify myself here. Why I cleared it was for the reason that I have met people who have been a true failures and even though I pity them, I consider myself lucky that I does not have life like them.
So I spend six years trying to find out why they say everything that happens around you happens in the same manner in which you think about it.
You say the wrong things and wrong things will happen to you. You say the right things and right things will happen to you. Obvious, isn’t it.
I followed it. After six years, I noticed something happening inside me.
Things that I said, recently, came out to be true. My hunches and my thoughts started happening exactly as I had thought about them. It all came from those learnings of philosophers, motivational gurus and thinkers whom I listened to for hours and who talked about controlling our minds.
It is secret that everybody knows but no one actually follows it because it is tough to practice and there are so many exceptions to it that it keeps breaking one’s beliefs left, right and centre.
But somehow I feel that I am in much more control now than I was before and I am much more well behaved than I was before. I have more confidence and I am more clear about things that I want to do in life.
I meet people who are sufferings from self-created problems in life and, considering my good nature, I try to help them.
But they don’t understand a single thing I say, instead they tell me that they already know what I am telling them. People, I have found are looking for solutions because solutions are just maps to the treasure but not treasure itself. People are looking for someone who can provide them the map and also walk on their behalf to the treasure and bring it to them.
Everyone knows everything these days and it is difficult to guide anyone.
You might be providing an absolute solution to their problems and they will cut you in between telling you they already know everything about it.
And I am like — Dude if you already know what I am telling you, if you already know the solutions, then why are you not using it?
Most people live in fool’s paradise and get angry when you pick them out of that paradise and show them the truth and the real world.
But then again, it is completely all right. Real life is quite fucked up and if the virtual fake world gives us a moment of satisfaction, I say that one must take it for a while.
But now I realize why this power of mind remained a secret for such a long time. People just think it is too easy to to be true.
They just don’t want to believe in it.
And I, for one, Have stopped telling people what can help them to get out of that shit they are sinking in.
So no, I am not going to help that man anymore who is in the quicksand. He has to find his own way to save himself.